Monday, 1 April 2013

Top Ten Distractions From Waiting By The Phone

So, you've just left the casting office - for a callback even - and you're pretty sure you've rocked it. Like, you're feeling pretty confident that it was one of your best auditions you've ever given. It may even be the best you've ever acted...ever. But now, your job is done. The audition is over, and there is nothing left for you to do but leave it up to the acting Gods.

You could be a normal, sane actor, who recognises that you've now completed your part of the job, you're satisfied with how you did and you can walk away knowing that even if you don't book it, you've made some good impressions that might help in the future, and you go off and have a sandwich or finish your shift at your day job or something.

Or you could be me! And obsess about it. And then...obsess about. And then tell yourself to stop obsessing about. And then feel really good about yourself by having had the good sense to stop obsessing about something you have no control over. ...And then obsess about it some more.

I have run the battery out of my phone about 8 times just by repeatedly checking it. This needs to stop! So! I have now compiled a list of things that actors can do to distract themselves from waiting by the phone...because nobody wants to be the one sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring!
Here it is...Top 10 Distractions From Waiting By The Phone: (Feel free to apply this to your dating life...)

1. Colour-Coordinate Your Closet!
         -true...my closet is already always colour-coordinated, but that doesn't mean I can't re-do it,
          in the other direction!
2. Chop Veggies!
         -This has a little built in bonus...for one, you have to focus super hard on the task at hand,
           because there are sharp tools involved and it is dangerous! Also, you can feel really good
           about it, because at the end of chopping veggies is eating veggies - and that is good for
           you! Think about it.
3. Start Watching "The Walking Dead" Series
         -Nothing like a Zombiepocalypse to take your mind off of ANYTHING EVER! OH MY
          GAWD THIS SHOW IS TERRIFYING!
4. Watch 3 Episodes of "How I Met Your Mother"
        -Because you've just been petrified by Walking Dead and you need a laugh.
5. Help Your Mom Clean Out the Garage!
        -This is best done with some sort of homemade beverage of the adult variety. You'd be
         surprised at how many heavy shelves you can lift with the power of vodka!
6. Fold Your Underwear
        -Nothing wrong with an organized under-things drawer. Seriously.
7. Drop Toothpicks on the Floor and Time How Long it Takes You To Count Them
        -...
8. Text People...Any People.
        -Because then you feel less like you're checking your phone desperately, and more like you
         have a lot of friends...
9. PINTEREST!!!
        -Because obviously.

and finally...

10. Talk to your Mr. Miyagi on the phone, and get the real "just be satisfied with the work you got to show them, the impression you may or may not have made, and move on. Of course you want the job, we all want the job, but it's not up to you anymore" speech.

Of course you want the job! Of course you want the job. But part of the job is understanding that every audition is an opportunity, or a networking session, or a chance to build relationships. It's not always about booking that particular spot. This ain't accounting people! Or any other normal job where you interview for a position and you either get it or you don't. You might get this job, you might book it, or you might not...but if you did your job right in the audition, it might land you another gig down the line. It's a bit of a slow trek, but it's a relief to know that every step is getting you closer. It takes the pressure off in the moment!

So put your phone down, and go do productive things! But...like...real productive things...you know, maybe something to further your career on your own time. More of that, less of underwear folding.